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7 Jokes about Grammar & Punctuation

  Tags: Punctuation | Joke | Grammar
 Language Learning Forum : Philological Room Post Reply
63 messages over 8 pages: 1 2 3 4 5 68 Next >>


Fasulye
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 Message 49 of 63
24 November 2011 at 2:56pm | IP Logged 
egill wrote:
Abdalan wrote:
Two "dumb quotes" walk into a bar, have two drinks (alt+0147 and
alt+0148), and then
leave as “smart quotes”.


The two “smart quotes” walk into a German bar the next day and one of them drinks too
much, falls to the floor, and they stagger out as „deutsche Anführungszeichen“


That's a real good one! :)

Fasulye

Edited by Fasulye on 24 November 2011 at 2:57pm

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QiuJP
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 Message 50 of 63
28 November 2011 at 5:01pm | IP Logged 
Some Russian ones:

Несовершенный глагол шёл в бар. Все не знают, он ли сейчас в баре.
Совершенный глагол пошёл в бар. Все знают. что он сейчас баре.

Translation:

An imperfective verb went in to a bar. All do not know, whether it is in the bar.
A perfective verb went into the bar. All know that it is in the bar.

I am sorry, but I have problem translating the different aspect of verbs in Russian to
English proper.
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vonPeterhof
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 Message 51 of 63
28 November 2011 at 5:11pm | IP Logged 
QiuJP wrote:
Some Russian ones:

Несовершенный глагол шёл в бар. Все не знают, он ли сейчас в баре.
Совершенный глагол пошёл в бар. Все знают. что он сейчас баре.

Translation:

An imperfective verb went in to a bar. All do not know, whether it is in the bar.
A perfective verb went into the bar. All know that it is in the bar.

I am sorry, but I have problem translating the different aspect of verbs in Russian to
English proper.


What you wrote can be translated into English like this:

An imperfective verb was going to a bar. Everybody doesn't know whether or not it's him that's in the bar right now.
A perfective verb went to the bar. Everybody knows that he is [in the] bar now.

Your perfective example doesn't mean that the verb is already there, it means that it has already departed to the bar. The verb you need to get the meaning you intended is пришёл, not пошёл. I would rephrase your examples this way:

Несовершенный глагол шёл в бар. Никто не знает, в баре ли он сейчас.
Совершенный глагол пришёл в бар. Все знают, что он сейчас в баре.
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QiuJP
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 Message 52 of 63
03 May 2012 at 6:53pm | IP Logged 
smallwhite wrote:
10. A noun walks into a bar, got declined, and he didn't like this
ending at all.


Then an adjective, a pronoun and an adverb walk into the same bar. The adjective and
pronoun got declined as well. Their endings were worse than the noun. The adverb is
indeclinable and the barman can do nothing. (Adverbs are indeclinable in Russian)

At a later time, Метро(metro), такси (taxi), радио(radio) and Джейн (Jane) walk into the
same bar. Barman tries to decline them, but realize that they are indeclinable (in
Russian).

Edited by QiuJP on 03 May 2012 at 8:19pm

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Arekkusu
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 Message 53 of 63
03 May 2012 at 8:35pm | IP Logged 
A nominative noun walks into a bar. He thought he'd be declined, but it wasn't the case.
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Arekkusu
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 Message 54 of 63
03 May 2012 at 8:39pm | IP Logged 
The exotic dancer worries the post position about.
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Arekkusu
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 Message 55 of 63
03 May 2012 at 8:55pm | IP Logged 
Trois touristes -- un Américain, un Slovène et un Allemand -- entrent dans un bar à Paris. On y refuse l'accès aux deux premiers. Pourquoi?

À cause de leur accent.

Translation:
Three tourists -- an American, an Slovene and a German -- go into a bar in Paris. The first two are denied access. Why?

Because of their accent.

Edited by Arekkusu on 03 May 2012 at 8:56pm

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DaraghM
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 Message 56 of 63
04 May 2012 at 9:53am | IP Logged 
An intransitive verbal phrase, skips the queue, and walks straight into the bar. He's a ViP.



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