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7 Jokes about Grammar & Punctuation

  Tags: Punctuation | Joke | Grammar
 Language Learning Forum : Philological Room Post Reply
63 messages over 8 pages: 1 24 5 6 7 8 Next >>
QiuJP
Triglot
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Singapore
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 Message 17 of 63
17 November 2011 at 4:17pm | IP Logged 
(Those who learn Slavic languages will understand the following!)

An imperfective verb walks into the bar, and did not complete his act of walking.
A perfective verb walks into the bar and completed his act of walking.
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DaraghM
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 Message 18 of 63
17 November 2011 at 4:43pm | IP Logged 
A homonym walks into a bar and hurts his head.
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DaraghM
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 Message 19 of 63
17 November 2011 at 4:53pm | IP Logged 
A genitive case walks into Harry's bar.
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Ari
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 Message 20 of 63
17 November 2011 at 7:08pm | IP Logged 
粵語落吧,人哋睇唔出佢係男定女。

This one translates even worse! "Cantonese walks into a bar. People can't tell if (s)he is a man or a woman."
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Ari
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 Message 21 of 63
17 November 2011 at 9:58pm | IP Logged 
I'm gonna make an attempt at a French one. Here's to all you francophone Tolkien fans:

Un nain, un elfe et deux ents entrent dans un bar. Le nain dit "je veux de la bière!", l'elfe dit "Je veux du vin!".
Les ents tout simplement gesticulent qu'ils veulent de l'eau. Le barman demande: "Les ents, ils ne parlent pas
le français?" Le nain réponds "Il me semble que toi non plus tu ne sais pas parler le français! Tu ne sais
même pas que les 'ent's sont muets!"

Translation: A dwarf, an elf and two ents walk into a bar. The dwarf says "I want beer!", the elf says "I want
wine!", and the ents simply gesticulate that they want some water. The bartender asks the dwarf: "Don't the
ents speak French?". The dwarf replies "It seems to me you don't speak it, either! You don't even know that
the 'ent's are silent!

With apologies for my horribly rusty French!

Edited by Ari on 18 November 2011 at 6:42am

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HMS
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 Message 22 of 63
17 November 2011 at 10:27pm | IP Logged 
And English teacher had a nasty accident and ended up in a comma.


There's got to be one about German separable verbs somewhere?!
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M. Medialis
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 Message 23 of 63
17 November 2011 at 11:43pm | IP Logged 
jdmoncada wrote:
Totally off topic (but a "walks into a bar" joke):


Rene Descartes walks into a bar.
The bardender asks, "Would you like a beer?"
Descartes says, "I think not."

And he disappears!


Yuk, yuk, yuk! I kill me.

Now back to your regularly scheduled grammar.



I had to look at it for a minute before I got it. Laugh Out Loud on this one. XD
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FuroraCeltica
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 Message 24 of 63
18 November 2011 at 1:01am | IP Logged 
Man walks into a bar and says ouch


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